Overcoming Imposter Syndrome
Dr. Yishai is a Psychologist, Business Consultant, and Executive Coach who helps leaders of multi-million dollar companies handle the human side of business to react powerfully, increase performance, and create win-win solutions.
The first time imposter syndrome was described, it was actually called imposter phenomena which I like better…because rather than it being a ‘disease’ you have that’s now stuck to you, it’s something that we experience as a phenomena.
They found that especially among really high achievers…certain people would really struggle to internalize and really accept their own success and view themselves as being able to be successful.
They’d be looking at themselves kind of backwards through a telescope…and you know if you’ve ever done that, whatever you look at looks really small…and that’s kind of how people can view themselves.
Whether its we’re starting something new or in something, what we keep looking at is something that is 2 or 3 dreams or goals or levels higher than where we’re currently at, then it’s easy to kind of turn that telescope and view myself as who am I?
There are a lot of emotions that come with that and I think we tend to make meaning of a lot of those emotions.
I’m not able to do the thing I dream or want or desire….I’m not already there.
Fake it til you make it…that thought really drives the narrative or the story that I’m an imposter.
Mindset by Carol Dweck
Fixed vs growth mindset
A fixed mindset views people as having a capability or they don’t have it…there isn’t really space to grow. The concept of fake it til you make it puts you in that view of either you’ve got it or you don’t and you just keep faking it and faking it and one day you’ll magically have it.
That doesn’t compute for me….because if I don’t believe people can change over time, what would I be doing all day?
If we couldn’t change over time, we would all either be born walking and talking or we’d never be able to walk and talk.
The growth mindset is the view that we are all constantly in growth. Which means if today I’m not able to do something, does that mean I will never be able to do it? No. I can grow my way into things. It takes the view that effort and time and energy are more important and that will help you get there.
Imposter syndrome is a lot more common among the students than among the professionals.
For professionals it will show up in moments, not neccesarily all the time. If it’s showing up all the time, that’s something that’s worth paying closer attention to.
Slow down and take a reality check….are you there yet? Maybe not. Do you have to be? Maybe not.
Learn your way into it.
Imagine those thoughts or feelings are trying to help you…what do they want for you? What is the end result they would hope for you? ….perhaps they want you to get better.
Okay brain….if you really want me to be competent…help me get there.
Once or twice a day…Ask yourself what you’ve accomplished.
There is a use case for comparison.
There is a difference between upward and downward comparison.
It’s like watching the Olympics and comparing yourself to the gold medal winner in in every different sport and then looking at yourself. How are we going to look at ourselves? If any one of those gold medal winners did the same thing, they’d feel terrible. They’d say…look at what all of these other people are capable of and all I did was this one thing.
The comparison wants me to reach for something higher….look at that person and see what they did and take something away…that if I learn from these people…then I can choose to do those things.
We don’t do these things automatically.
Triple A Treatment:
Awareness
Analysis
Action
When you’re feeling stuck in the imposter syndrome, at least that’s a place to start and it’s also perhaps helpful to direct you to move forward.
Sometimes imposter syndrome can show up with depression or anxiety. If you are experiencing some of that, it’s very important to consider if not explore the idea of seeing a therapist.
And while I may be a psychologist, I’m not your psychologist, so do your own research and speak with a professional.
You don’t need to rush. Whatever it is that’s your goal, it’s a journey with obstacles and growth along the way.
Website: https://www.DrYishai.com
Email: Yishai@DrYishai.com
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podcast : The Business Couch with Dr. Yishai https://www.dryishai.com/podcast
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