What Others Think of You Is None of Your Business
Success Development Solutions
Amber Fuhriman is an attorney, speaker, success architect, and podcaster. She is the Owner and Attorney at Fuhriman Law, a Law Firm she operates in Las Vegas, Nevada. Amber practices Criminal Defense and Immigration Law. She graduated from Law School in Michigan and immediately moved to Vegas to being her career.
Throughout her educational and professional career, Amber always thought there would be a moment where everything would fall into place, as she calls it, her “I’ll be happy when moment.” When that moment never came, Amber started to realize her entire identity had been tied up in being an attorney and chasing accomplishments to fill a void that accomplishments could never fill. Amber’s road to becoming a success architect began in 2016 when she dug into personal development. Since 2016, Amber has pushed the boundaries of her self-imposed physical and mental limitations, living outside her comfort zone as much as possible and learning about how the mind works and how our limiting beliefs affect our success.
In 2020, Amber became a Certified Trainer in Neuro-Linguistic Programming and a Certified Master Practitioner in Integrated Timeline Techniques. Now, in addition to practicing law, Amber is a Success Architect and NLP Trainer. She works with “serial accomplishers” like her former self to help them gain clarity what they actually want, define what their best life looks like and helps them get out of their comfort zone to achieve their dreams.
Amber believes that pushing yourself out of your comfort zone physically helps challenge your mental limitations of what you can accomplish professionally. She uses her experiences with loss, grief, academic and professional success, and physical challenges including a 24 hour endurance obstacle course race to help her clients get out of their own way and achieve their highest level of success.
www.successdevelopmentsolutions.com
www.linkedin.com/in/amberraefuhriman
https://www.facebook.com/groups/morethancorporate
www.marlanasemenza.com
Audio : Ariza Music Productions
Transcription : Vision In Word
Amber
I'm So glad to be here. Thank you So much for having me. You know, I feel we're just talking about this. And I'm super excited, because I get to travel a lot. And So, I feel like this is one of the benefits of what we get to do is like, we can do this from anywhere. And it really creates like a really cool freedom. So, thanks for work on your schedule around me.
Marlana
Oh, absolutely. So, you know, when I was mentally preparing for all this, a thought came to mind that I had read it, in effect it was if you live by persons compliments, you will die by their criticism. And I thought that that was just such an appropriate thing for this conversation. Because how does that affect our success and our self-worth and our all those things going forward conversation and community?
Amber
A lot of times we look for that validation from the people around us. And that will that's what causes So many of the crashes that people have later on in their careers in their life is that they have chased that Person who thought this would be a good idea. So, let me do that. So, they'll like me, when really what we need is that internal validation and that internal compliment, which is the most uncomfortable to give. And So, I really think I love that quote. And I think it could be expanded on by saying that the moment that you start chasing internal compliments, is that moment that things kind of fall into place for you.
Marlana
And those seem to be the most elusive. So, how do we actually catch those fleeing critters.
Amber
So, I think that every Person is different. And this is where what I do with NLP comes into play So much, because for those who aren't familiar with NLP, or neurolinguistics programming, it's the science behind the way that we see the world based upon the experiences that we've had. So, there are Some things that are universally accepted. And one of them that I find is almost universally accepted is that we live in a society where we were told not to brag not to compliment ourselves to compliment others. Now, there are exceptions to every rule in parents who raised their children to be complimentary of themselves. And they found this amazing balance between being confident and being egotistical. And that's the other thing too is our society teaches us that confidence is egotistical until you get to a point where confidence is sexy and attractive. And let me just say interject
Marlana
one thing. It seems to be more So, for women than men.
Amber
Yeah, I agree with you. And I disagree with you. At the same time. I think that women express it more. I think that men feel it and then put up a mask that looks like strength. So, I believe in my experiences that it affects both equally. It's just easier and more Socially accepted for us to talk about it. And So, we think about it that way.
Marlana
See, and I would have thought exactly the opposite that for women to express their strength, for women to brag So to speak. It's more looked down upon than if a man does it because of a man Yeah.
Amber
Then that's showing me clarify because I see what I see what you're saying. And I agree with you. If a So, there's this area, right if we're looking at this as a scale or a graph, there's this middle area that is like true confidence and anybody who Seen it or been around it or felt that energy, like, it's totally infectious, attractive and happiness, right? Like, you just want to be around that person because they truly believe in themselves. By believing in themselves and being confident in themselves, they believe in others and be confident in others. But then there's these ends of the spectrum that are filled with fake confidence. And that's where I think the masks for men show up. And the other side of it of the ego. So, it either comes off on one end, as I don't like anybody, I got this mask up, don't talk to me. Or for women resting bitchface, right? Don't talk to me. Or it comes up on the other side, as I know everything. I don't need anybody to tell me to look at me. Look how amazing I am. Don't talk to me. Now, that side of the spectrum, I feel like is more accepting of women than men? I feel like if women are there, then they're unrealistic and bitchy. And who do they think they are? And if men are there, they're just being met. Right? So, I agree with you there. But that that middle area where we all want to be, I think is as equally evasive for men and women. It's just those spectrums that we accept differently.
Marlana
So, how do we get to the middle?
Amber
Oh, all right. So, we were talking a few minutes ago about that universal or almost universal belief that it's not okay to compliment yourself. It's really interesting, because we don't talk about our successes, we talked about other people's successes, but then we can't talk about our failures either, because then we're just asking for pity. So, you're only supposed to talk about the things that go right. But then you're being fake, right? So, there's all of these rules that go on, that we in our minds have created based upon what societal expectations we were raised with. And the short and simple but not easy answer is to get rid of all of that. And to be willing to talk about your successes as much as you talk about your failures, and to be willing to compliment yourself as much as you compliment other people. And to be willing to sit in a space of love, peace and acceptance with yourself the same way that you would sit in a space of love, peace and acceptance with somebody else. I said it was simple, not easy, it's incredibly difficult to do. Because we have to quiet that voice in our head. That tells us that what we're doing is wrong or unacceptable, or we're going to be rejected because of it. And in the end, when you choose to do that, you're actually more accepted because of it.
Marlana
And I know yet another thing that I read at one point, little quote was that you would stop worrying about what other people think of you when you realize how little they do. Yeah! No, we're not on everybody's radar. It's So,
Amber
Yeah! No, we're not on everybody's radar. It's So true. So, without going scientifical, I try So hard to stay out of like the NLP science side of it, because it's So deep. The reality is our unconscious minds which run 90% of everything we do stop developing at the ages of about eight. So, we have an eight year old running our life. What happens when you walk into a room or when you're in a room talking and an eight year old walks in, and you stop talking? The first thing, whether it's things were you talking about me? Our unconscious mind takes everything, personally, everything. And this is why whenever you're giving advice to somebody, many times you're actually giving advice to yourself. Or whenever you're looking at somebody and saying God, I can't believe that she did, that she's such a jerk. Like she's So full of herself. And I don't know why she thinks she can dress like that. What you're actually saying is, I could never dress like that. I can't believe that she would do that because I would feel uncomfortable in that situation. Or you're saying I could don't dress like that. If you ever dress like that, then this is what people are going to think about you. We don't realize that this is where that fine line between self-deprecating humor becomes So, dangerous, is our brains don't understand the difference between truth and fiction. This is why visualization works. This is why we like TV and movies and books So, much is because our brain takes it as real. This is why we can have a human connection and cry when somebody in a movie dies knowing that the actor that played that Person is doing an interview 10 minutes later and they're fine. It's because our brain takes everything as fat. So, when you say oh my gosh, that I did that again. I guess you can't trust me. What you're saying is you really can't trust what your brain doesn't understand. So, when I hear somebody who needs to deflect by self-deprecating humor, it's So, dangerous. So, with that being said, I found this because I needed it right. And I was suffering panic house, I was suffering from anxiety attacks, I needed Something to help me grow my business. And I found NLP. And I went through all the trainings, and I did the work. And I learned about myself, and I learned about the way that the mind works. And about a year and a half into my training. I was at the end of one of our sessions, and I stood up in front of the group that we've been working with our class for that training. And I was giving a debrief of what my experiences had been like. And all of a sudden, they started crying. And my coach and mentor says, are you okay? And I said, it's quiet. And she says, in the room, and I said, No, in my head, I said, the voices that I've constantly had to talk over, that tell me that I'm not wearing the right thing, or I didn't do my hair the right way. Or nobody wants to hear what I'm saying, or they just want me to sit down or they're laughing at me because of my weight, or am I too skinny? Or what am I too, we all have that, right? And for the first time in my life, they weren't there, and they have never come back. There's doubt, and there's fear, and there's human emotions. But that, as we call it, itty bitty shitty committee that sits in your head and constantly tells you that nobody wants to hear what you have to say, or you're doing the wrong thing is gone. So, the best answer I can give people is to trust the process and uncomfortably do the work until those voices go away.
Marlana
What do you think was the real catalyst for you or the tipping point for you in all of it? And throughout the NLP process are the decision to go to it?
Amber
Okay, Alright! So, the decision to go to it, I feel like is where I'll start, because it's one that affects So, many people. I lost, you know, my story, but I've had a long history with loss in my life. I, my first experience with suicide was when I was eight years old, and my cousin committed suicide, lost my uncle to suicide when I was 16, lost my dad in an accident at 18. And I shut down. And when my dad passed away, and I went to a doctor's appointment, within like a week for Something unrelated, they tried to medicate me with depression medication, because I must be sad. So, I need depression medication. And in my head, I just told you that the brain learns from experience. And So, to me, if I talk to anybody about what happened with my dad, they weren't gonna medicate me. So, I couldn't talk about it.
For 15 years, I never went to grief counseling. I never talked about my dad in an emotional way. In a public forum, I talked about intellectually, it's one of the reasons that I chose to go to law school, not to honor him, but to run from the emotions that I didn't want to feel about his loss. Because I tell people all the time, that it's really ironic. And then when I learned about it not So ironic, that I chose one of the least emotional professions to go into, after all of the trauma that I had, and how emotional that profession really is. We just refuse to feel it, which is where we're at right now. Right? So, for 15 years, I compartmentalized. I ran from my emotions, I refuse to feel I wonder why all my relationships failed. Because I didn't understand that you can't hide certain emotions and feel others. And in 2016, I was living the life that was supposed to take it all the way. You talked about it in the beginning, my I'll be happy when moment. And I wasn't frickin happy. And all of a sudden, instead of all the rainbows and sunshine and happiness this was supposed to bring. I was insane when I was still numb, and I was exhausted. And that's where the panic attacks and anxiety attacks came from. So, I started going to therapy. And in therapy, I was talking to my therapist, maybe two months in and they said, You know, I just feel like such a failure. And she says, Amber, you have a six figure income. You have a law degree, you're the first person in your family, go to college, you live by yourself, you support yourself, you don't rely on anybody. You're respected in your profession. I could go on and on. What does success mean to you? I don't know, nobody's ever asked me that.
So, that was kind of the first step of realizing that I didn't know what success meant to me and realizing that it didn't have to be the prestige and the respect and the money that came along with being an attorney. So, when I opened my business, I realized that I knew absolutely nothing about running a business. So, I started to try to find business seminars. And one of the seminars that I walked into was NLP based talking about you get to achieve the success that you want to have, will combine the fact that I didn't know what success meant for me with the fact that Somebody here was telling me how I could have it. Those two things seemed contradictory to me. And I wanted to explore that more, which is why I went down that path. I feel like this is important to go into because what I did is So common, and I was So manipulative, and So emotionally controlling to the people around me, and I had no idea, no idea whatsoever. It showed up as calling the people that I was dating constantly, it showed up as a complete lack of trust. But what that looked like was wanting to be with them all the time and being clingy and attached at the hip. It showed up as expressing whatever emotions I needed to express to get Somebody to do what I wanted them to do. And I didn't even know that I was doing it. What led to my panic attacks and anxiety attacks was I was away from Las Vegas at Some court appearances in Reno. And I got into an argument with the person I was dating at the time. And all of the emotionally manipulative things that I would do in the past don't work when Somebody won't pick up their phone. And for the first time in my life, I was left to me. I was left to sit with myself and deal with my own emotions and talk myself off, why am I feeling like this. And I didn't have the tools and resources to do that. So, I hyperventilated in a corner for four days. So, I call her therapist while I'm up. And this is the most important part of my journey. I called a therapist while I was in Reno, booked an appointment filled out the intake packet because you're in that pain point, right? It sucks, you feel it. And then I get home, and my axe picks me up at the airport. And life is normal again. And I'm fine. And I don't really need to go talk to anybody because I'm okay. Right. And So, this is really 15 years of my cycle is I'm really sad. I'm really sad. Let me manipulate my situation to control what I can, now I feel better because I'm in control.
So, I don't really need to talk to anybody. And God bless him. He edits my podcasts. Now he's my best friend, we never dated after that moment, but he's my best friend. He looked at me and said, What do you have to lose? You've paid the first console, you filled out all the forms, like all you have to do is show up. If you go and you don't need it, you haven't lost anything that you haven't already done. I was like, Well, I guess I'll go just So, I can prove to you that I don't need therapy, and then 90 minutes of bawling later because I didn't need therapy. I worked with her for another year. So, I go this deep into this story. Because So many people are living that cycle, I want to talk to Somebody, I want help, I need help. I want to learn this, I want to get out of my career I want to whatever that is for you. But then Something happens to normalize the way that you feel and it's never healthy. It's never a healthy response. And then all of a sudden, you're fine until you're not. And then when you're not fine. The only thing you can think about is how do I get fine again, but then as soon as you're fine, you don't need it. And I continued living the cycle until my mind, my body, my soul, everything said you can't do this anymore. And it showed up as panic and anxiety.
So, that's the first thing I want people to understand is that it's okay to not be okay. And it's okay to go talk to Somebody and it's okay to acknowledge that you need Something and don't know what that Something is and bring Somebody into your life that can help you find that where the turning point came in my actual transformation is throughout the NLP process throughout the training, there's Something that we do that deals with your relationship or unhealthy relationship I should say with the five major human emotions (anger, fear, hurt, sadness and guilt). And it's gonna sound really voodoo if I explain it in too much detail So, I'll surface level it that because it is weird, I never would have gone if anybody would have said this is what it's gonna look like. I'm like you which go away. The reality is though, when We allow your unconscious mind to go back to the first time that it felt those emotions and look at all the other things that actually could have been or could have meant. And then re associate what that emotion or that relationship means. Because the first time that we ever feel hurt, sadness, anger, fear, or guilt is compounded throughout all of the other experiences that are dictated by that one experience.
Marlana
Can you?
Amber
Yeah, So, let's say when you're a kid, you want to go out and you want to play with your friends, and your mom says no, and you get pissed. And actually, you know what, this was a perfect example. You get pissed, and you throw a temper tantrum, and you get what you want. What that tells you is that getting angry and throwing a fit results in you getting what you want. And then as an adult, that looks like getting angry, throwing a fit, gets you what you want, until it doesn't right. Now, what that harnesses as isn't, let me be emotionally manipulative. What it harnesses as inside of us is, this person doesn't understand me, because when you're three, and you want to go outside and play in the street, and your mom says, No, all you think is my mom doesn't want me to have any fun. I hate her. Right? When you're an adult, and you want to go on vacation, and your boss says no, all you think as my boss doesn't want me to have any fun, right? It's the same. So, our relationship with those emotions dictates how we show up. If we were capable of going back to that moment, when we were three, and realizing oh, my mom didn't hate me, she actually loved me and wanted to be me to be safe. Instead of anger, I could have learned these lessons from it, it could have been safety, and it could have been respect. And it could have been, maybe I needed to work for it, it could have been accomplishments, or it could have been focus, it could have been whatever it is that you're supposed to learn from that experience.
Well, now that that doesn't mean the same thing to you anymore, then the way that you show up as an adult doesn't show up the same way anymore, because your relationship to that is different. So, it's this huge, long process. And when we do it in a training environment, or when I do it with a client in a breakthrough environment. So, this is what coaching with me looks like 25 minutes of this until we get to where you want to go. When Somebody says I don't have time for a year of that, we can do it all at once. And it takes about 12 to 18 hours depending on the person and how much they fight it, and how deep that they will allow themselves to go because we're onions, right. So, when we do this once, then all of a sudden, we think of other things that we've been repressing, because now we've dealt with these emotions. So, with constant work, we are a constant work in progress. And allowing yourself to do the work is where you grow and transform. So, for me, the moment that I talked about where those voices disappeared in my head, was the moment that I sat down and did this mine was 16 hours, a 16 hour breakthrough, where I just really re invented myself in my head. And what's really cool as a practitioner of it, is we show up neurologically through physiological appearances. So, if you've ever seen Somebody, and you're like, man! You're like, Something happens to them. And they're just glowing, right? And they look like a completely different person. You see Somebody who maybe goes to a retreat, or they go on vacation, and when they left, they looked one way and when they come back, you're like, Man, you look completely different. It's because they are completely different, because of the way that they're showing up neurologically, and that's expressing itself in physiological terms.
This is why interrogators are So, good at what they do. Because Something triggers you your eyes move your skin gets read, your voice changes, like we constantly have physiological responses to things. As a criminal defense attorney, I've only represented one client with multiple personalities, and it was one of the most terrifying experiences I've ever had. Not from a I was afraid he was going to hurt me standpoint. It was before I found out any of this that I'm doing now. It was from a I don't understand what's going on in your head and that scares me standpoint. But I would sit in a room with him. And you could see him physiologically change as his personality. shifted, and his voice would change. Like one moment I was talking to my client. And the next moment, I'm talking to a woman, and she her name's different. And she doesn't remember, like, it was So, weird. Doing this experience with people, this breakthrough experience is the closest that I, the closest way that I can describe it is back to that multiple personalities situation where I'm working with Somebody, and they're one person. And as we're going through the work, I can physiologically see, the moment that their brain transforms, I can physiologically see in them, the moment that it clicks. And they are showing up differently. Some people stand up straighter, Some people, like their entire physiology completely changes. And it's the coolest thing to watch. Because when you're on the other side of that they are completely different people.
Marlana
So, because I don't fully understand all the ins and outs of it. I'm gonna liken it to letting baggage go along the way.
Amber
100%.
Marlana
And So, once we've let baggage go, how do we keep from picking it back up?
Amber
Oh, yeah. So, those are the tools and resources that we need to be able to gain because we never pick up the same baggage, you just pick up new baggage, right? Like it's this constant. Like I let go of that.
Marlana
And I'm pretty handled. Let's go with this.
Amber
Let's do that. Exactly. So, it really comes down to what we were talking about in the beginning, being able to be present and kind and loving and supportive of yourself, to be able to ask yourself, What's the true purpose of me wanting to be involved in this person, place or thing? I recently did a podcast episode on how outgoingness can be a mask for insecurity. And for me, it definitely was, I was constantly doing things I was involved in dancing. I was involved in obstacle course racing, I was a full time attorney. I was involved in camping and hiking and being with my family. And my mom would always tell me like, when are you going to slow down? I'm like, No, I'm good. The truth is if I slow down, and I had to sit alone with myself, and I had to hear the thoughts that I didn't want to hear and the thoughts that I didn't want to think So, I'm exhausted, I don't want to go hang out with people anymore. I'm a huge introvert. Right? I need my alone time to be able to recharge. But in my alone time is me. And I don't want to be with me. So, I'm just going to exhaust myself until I come home, I pass out I go to sleep, I wake up in the morning, I start doing stuff again. So, I don't have to be alone with me. This was what I was dealing with for So, many years. And everybody else saw it as good lord ampere has a lot of interests I do. I have a lot of amazing interests. But that wasn't why it was doing them. So, now, you know, any introvert and really, there's Some extroverts that go through this too, but introverts will understand. When Somebody asks you to go do Something. And you're really enjoying that warm, comfy cave, you vote for you on your couch. And you don't want to go but you know, if you don't go, you're gonna feel guilty for not going and So, you go back in this.
Marlana
Yeah, never feel.
Amber
Yeah, this seesaw in your, in your mind, being able to ask yourself, like, what is the purpose for me wanting to go? What is the purpose for me not wanting to go? And being able to answer those two questions and reconcile them. The purpose of you not wanting to go might be fear. The purpose of you wanting to go might be that you don't want to upset anybody. And if that's the reason that you want to go then don't go stay home in your little cave. If fear is the reason you don't want to go, then get off your ass and go. But be willing to check in with yourself to find out what the purpose is for the decisions that you're making in your life. Because until we understand what the purpose is of our decisions, we can't make better ones to create a better life for ourselves. Being willing to understand the purpose of our decisions requires us to have real conversations with ourselves that many of us don't want to have. So, we just fill our days with as much stuff as we can.
Marlana
You know, and in listening to all that you said and what your story is what your background is all that it is So, eerily similar to a girl that a lot of that I knew and a lot of people that I know knew who committed suicide a few months ago. And So, and I understand that you are not in the that space, those aren't the people that you talk to you deal with that, you know, that's not your expertise. However. Because it is So similar to the situation you were in, if you were to go back and talk to that version of Amber, knowing what you know now, what would you say to her?
Amber
Oh, So, you're right. And I do want to clarify that I'm in no way a therapist, I'm not a psychiatrist, I'm not a psychologist. I don't treat, I would say, feel like, be willing to be open and vulnerable with people with zero fear of retaliation, because I feel like that's one of the reasons that it's one of the reasons that we keep things inside So much, is because we wonder what people will think of us do or say to us if they knew what we were experiencing, and this is So much my story, I've never been suicidal. But I have had moments where I felt like if I talked about what I wanted to talk about, I was going to lose my career, my circle, my life that I had built So much for. And, you know, I've never been in a situation where I don't see a way out of that. And I'm So thankful for that. The other thing that I want to say, and this is to everybody else. Anybody who thinks that random thoughts in your mind are random thoughts, is completely and entirely wrong. We are all energetically connected. And there's this really cool video called I Am, you can purchase it on Amazon Prime, it's like three bucks, I think. And it's directed it's a documentary by the director of most of the, like the mass, the Jim Carrey movies. And it's his story about how having all of the success and the money made him unhappy. And So, he was in this point where he physically made himself ill because of how unhappy he was. The documentary is amazing. But there's a moment in it as he's going through researching what happiness really is, where he's talking to Some research scientists, and I'm doing an experiment with him. And they take this petri dish full of yogurt, and they put one of those, the they have the prongs, and you've got the meter that goes back and forth on it like the energetic things. Clearly, it's not my field. And
Marlana
clearly my meter, because I can't help you with it.
Amber
But you know what I'm talking about here, right? Like the little box with the arrows that go back and forth, and the electrons that go in whatever you're testing, So, they put that in the yogurt, and then they sit him next to the yogurt not connected by anything. And they asked him to think about things. And he thinks about when he was going through a bad legal dispute at the time. And he said, Do you want to call your attorney and the yogurt started spinning? Right, it started intellect. It started energetically responding to his thoughts, whether they were positive or negative. So, we are all energetically connected to every person and thing that we in our life. So, when you're sitting in your house, and this is for everybody else, when you're sitting there, and you think, man, I really should call Marlana today. It's not a random thoughts. If that person has popped into your head, they've popped into your head for a reason. How many times have we decided to act on that? And we've picked up the phone, and we've called Somebody, and what you get is normally one of two things. I just had the most amazing experience. And I'm So, crazy that you called me right now, let me tell you about it. Or you have no idea how much I really need to talk to Somebody today. How many times have we left a comment or sent a text message to Somebody saying I don't know why? But I feel like we need to hear this right now. Or we've seen a Facebook post. And we're like, man, that's what I needed to hear right now. Nothing's accidental. So, for the people who are on the other side of it, that think they should be reaching out to Somebody. You should be reaching out to Somebody what's the worst that can happen? Because they say oh, hey, thanks for calling. Right? I promise you they need to hear from you. So, I don't know if that is the answer you're looking for. But that's what I've got for you.
Marlana
Love it. Love this whole conversation. And with that Amber I just have four final questions for you. First one is what is the best piece of advice you're ever given?
Amber
So, I thought about this for a long time. And I think the best piece of advice that I can give in the context of this conversation was from Brene Brown in her TED talk The Power of Vulnerability, and it might have been one of our follow TED Talks talking about the power of vulnerability, but either way, it was Brene Brown. And she said, if you're not also, in the arena, getting your ass kicked, I'm in no way interested in your opinion.
Marlana
Yeah, I love that whole Invictus poem. Share with us one thing on your bucket list.
Amber
There is, and this will happen next year. So, I just you guys fear has driven my life for a long time. And it showed up as academic achievements. I have never had a passport. Because if I had a passport, then the reason that I haven't explored the world is me. If I don't have a passport, then I can't go. So, I just got in the mail my first passport two weeks ago. And I'm going to go to Finland over my birthday in 2023. And sleep in glass igloos where I can watch the Northern Lights. So, recall my dad, I told you that he passed away when I was 18. I just recently got this tattoo and his honor. And it's the northern lights inside of a dolphin, which is my spirit animal. The Northern Lights are on my dad's headstone, they were mine. And my dad's connection is the stars, I can go sit on the stars, and I can just feel his presence every time I'm there. And So, I'm really, really excited to jump on a plane, go to Finland and just be with nature and his memory and all of the beautiful things and overcome my fear. I've never traveled internationally, except Canada, and I'm half Canadian, So, that doesn't count.
Marlana
Okay, when the toy companies finally get around to making an action figure view, what two accessories will it come with?
Amber
This was hard. So, I'm gonna say wings or a cape of Some kind, because finds fun, and I love it. And then the other one is going to be Some Sort of truth procuring device, whether it's a serum or, and it's not, because I want to know what everybody is thinking behind what they're thinking, I can gather that for the most part with the training that I have. Could you imagine how amazing of a world we would live in if everybody was willing to be honest with themselves and others about how they felt!
Marlana
And if I could be really hard doesn't remind me of that Jim Carrey movie, though, and that kind of went a little haywire.
Amber
It did. However, there's the other side of being willing to accept other people's version of honesty, which is what that movie misses, right? I can tell you what I'm feeling and how honest I'm being. And you can't tell me I'm not being honest. Right? Because it's not your truth. Right? So, the willingness to speak your truth and the willingness to allow others to accept that So, whatever piece of equipment allows me to give that to the world is what I would carry while I fly around and zooms in
Marlana
love it. And the last one Amber, how do people find you when they want to hire you, they want to work with you? Lol, NLP stuff, how do they find you?
Amber
The best way is going to be to go to my website and you can go to successdevelopment Solutions.com/your iconic image. And there is an entire page that is dedicated to all things Marlana amazing. And you can access all of my information there.
Marlana
Wonderful! Thank you So very much, and thanks for being here.
Amber
Thank you.